Becoming a parent is an exciting event which will change your relationship with your partner, so make sure you work together to get a wonderful start.
Learning together
Both of you may feel nervous handling your newborn at first. Sharing the care of your baby from the start quickly dispels this fear and is an important way of bonding the three of you into a family unit. Encourage your partner to hold and handle your baby as much as possible - share cuddles, changing and bathing and take it in turns to go to your baby when he cries. This stops you feeling like you're doing all the work and prevents your partner feeling shut out.
Coping with night feeds
If you're breastfeeding your baby, your partner can still help you, by bringing your baby to you so you don't have to get up at night, fetching you a glass of water or changing the baby's nappy. If you express, your partner can give night feeds, too, so you can have nights off. He can also be supportive if your baby cries or won't settle.
Helping in the house
It can sometimes take all morning to get your baby and yourself out of the house, so your partner can help with the shopping and cooking. If he's not sure what to buy, give him a list of healthy, minimum preparation foods, such as plenty of fruit and vegetables, wholemeal bread, hard cheese, rice cakes, breadsticks, fruit juice, plain yoghurt, nuts, seeds and dried fruit.
Sleeping it off
Your bed may become the centre of the house for a while, so dozing on it with your partner and baby is a lovely way for you all to be together. It also gives you a chance to catch up on some much-needed rest, snuggled up with your partner, while giving him a chance to cuddle his newborn.
Face to face
Your new baby loves faces and enjoys nothing better than gazing at both of you, which is a great way for you all to get to know one another. He adores being talked to and may react within days to both your voices, which he recognises from his time in the uterus (womb).
Handling visitors
While you'll appreciate visitors cooing over your baby, they can also be very tiring, especially if they expect to be waited on. Part of your partner's new role as father can be answering the constant stream of phone calls and restricting visiting hours. And once they're there, make sure your partner is making the endless cups of tea!
This is it
Most new parents go through some doubt or panic as the responsibility of being alone with a newborn hits home. Then there are times when you don't know why he's crying or if he's getting enough milk. Agree on a source of support that both of you are happy to call on and ask for advice. Your relationships with your family and friends will change, and you may find great emotional and practical support from both sets of parents, that may surprise you. Give yourselves time together, too, and say 'yes' to any offers of babysitting.
Sexy stuff
When to resume your sex life varies greatly from couple to couple - some may feel ready within days of the birth, others don't feel like it for months afterwards. Don't worry if you feel you've lost your desire for your partner - it's natural, thanks to your exhaustion after giving birth, changes in your hormone levels and broken nights. However, if your lack of sexual intercourse is becoming a problem, make sure you discuss your difficulties. Just spending time alone with your partner, without having to look after your baby, can be more important than sex for now, so try to keep up the activities you've always shared in the past.
